How I became a Single Mom

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Single mom, motherhood,

Kunle and I met at Ndidi’s wedding. We struck it off almost immediately. I was the friend Ndidi could trust to pick up the cash she would be sprayed on the D-day and Kunle was Peter’s.  Ndidi’s now-husband.  You know that friend that you need to be everywhere but not to be part of the bridesmaids or Groom’s men. Yeah, that was Kunle and I for Ndidi and Peter.

Kunle had bent over to hear what Peter was saying to him on the dancing floor and I was just pulling myself up from the floor where I had been picking money when I hit Kunle with my head. Wow, the force caused his lower lip to get caught up in-between his teeth and bled slightly.

‘Oh my God! I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry! Kunle now covering his lips with his right palm started backing away, while mentioning with his left hand for me to stay back. He moved away quickly to avoid causing a scene as this happened right on the dance floor. Thankfully it was towards the end, not much to pick again. I quickly packed everything I had picked now in two bags getting a bit weighty handed them over to Nkoli, Ndidi’s younger sister who was her chief bridesmaid and went after  Kunle as I later found out was his name.

Long story short, we ended up laughing about the whole drama, and Kunle and I became friends from thence.

He always teased me about how we met and we often said God must have a sense of humor, considering how amazing things start with what may be termed negative.

We dated for two years. Those were the best two years of my whole life. Kunle was a perfect gentleman, every woman’s dream. Hardly gets upset, says and does all the right things, kind, compassionate, a dream lover.

The last Valentine before our wedding was a most memorable one for me, Kunle sent a chauffeured Benz to pick me up from the office, drove me to a hotel to take a shower and change into the ‘Cinderella’ dress and shoes he got for me for Valentine. A makeup artist was waiting to make me up, hair and face, along with a professional dresser. That night, I felt like a real princess, didn’t recognize myself in the mirror. Dinner was at an exquisite restaurant, private dining on a seven-course meal. Kunle proposed that night. Who would say no to such a heavenly offer? Lol!

Kunle and I believed in strong values and principles and one of them was purity. We pledged to save sex till our wedding night. Things were fine until our parents came into the picture.

Kunle was an only son and an only child with strong ties with his mum. Don’t get me wrong, Kunle was no mama’s boy but loved his mum deeply and would do anything for her. On the other hand, I am the first daughter of my parents, also under immense pressure from my parents. The pressure was not a big deal for me, until I met Kunle. I felt there was no need to waste any more time since we already agreed to get married, but there was only one problem. Kunle’s parents insisted on me getting pregnant before agreeing to a wedding date. Ha! Pregnancy before marriage ke?! How?

Remember Kunle is an only child, so his mom was not willing to take any chances. According to her, she wanted her grandchild underway and did not want to hear ‘we are waiting on the Lord’.

That was how we began a long battle of trying to change Kunle’s parent’s mind and assuring them that we were both fine and they had nothing to worry about. Like, they say in our local parlance, that was ‘story for the gods’. It was either that or no wedding. My world came crumbling. Should I end the relationship with the man with whom I have found true love after several heartbreaks and long waiting or should I stick with my principles?

I am sure you are wondering how this led to being a single mother right? Well, find out in the concluding part of this story.